The Many Faces of Abuse

An often overlooked form of abuse is emotional abuse. Whether at home, in the workplace, or in a relationship, emotional abuse is extremely detrimental to one's self-esteem. Beverly Engel, MFCC, writes of 10 forms of emotional abuse in her book: The Emotionally Abused Woman. Do any of these sound familiar?

• Domination-the need to be in charge
  
• Verbal Assaults-berate, belittle, criticize, name call, blame
  
• Abusive Expectations-unreasonable demands, constantly selfish
  
• Emotional Blackmail-coercion via fear, guilt, or compassion
  
• Unpredictable Responses-drastic mood swings and sudden outbursts
  
• Constant Criticism-unrelentingly critical, always finds fault
  
• Character Assassination-humiliates, criticizes, discounts
  
• Gaslighting-insidious acts to make you doubt self or reality
  
• Constant Chaos-continual upheaval and discord
  
• Sexual Harrassment-unwelcome physical or verbal sexual advance
  

If you find yourself in an emotionally abusive relationship the first step is to admit it. This may sound easy but is frequently the most difficult. Then seek support in family, friends, support groups, or a therapist. With support you can make a pan and end the abuse. A poster I've seen reads, "A bend in the road is not the end of the road...unless you fail to make the turn." Turn the corner to health, esteem and serenity.