Last time we looked at Senior isolation, loneliness and depression for our loved ones who are living on their own, or maybe even with you. But, what about those in assisted living? How can they feel isolated when there are other people around them? How can they feel lonely when they are almost never alone?

Loneliness among the elderly is not merely a lack of companionship; it's the absence of meaningful connections that once defined their daily lives. If they don’t feel truly connected to or supported by the people around them, being with them may not provide enough fulfillment to combat loneliness. They may no longer have the relationships that once meant so much to them.
 
It's difficult to watch a loved one navigate the waters of loneliness and depression. And loneliness and depression in seniors has some health risks associated with it, including heart disease and stroke. And for those with heart failure, the risk of emergency room visits, or hospitalization increases. So, what can we do to help the people we love deal with these feelings. Keeping a senior active and engaged might seem challenging, especially if you live far away or if your loved one is living with health, cognitive, or mobility limitations. So, what can we do to help? Try some of the following:
 

• Call them: use the phone, Zoom, or a video phone call.
  Regular contact with loved ones, even phone calls, FaceTime, or Zoom, can help an older adult maintain social connections. If your loved one struggles with technology, a professional caregiver can help with set-up and troubleshooting to get them going.
• Help them feel needed and valued.
  Depression in the elderly sometimes stems from feeling unwanted or not valued. Ask for input or assistance from your loved one — even if they live far away. They will thrive and appreciate the opportunity to assist.
• Participate in favorite activities.
  Find activities you both enjoy, and plan times together to do them. Stay connected through regular visits, weekend dinners, baking cookies, card games, evening walks, or grandchildren’s sporting events. These activities can go a long way toward preventing isolation and depression.
• Create opportunities for companionship.
  Encourage your older loved one to safely engage in activities with community groups, religious organizations, and senior centers to provide opportunities to meet new friends and socialize. If they are in assisted living, they may have planned activities there in which your loved one can participate. If they are living alone, hiring a companion can sometimes help.

 
But what if this loneliness becomes something more: depression. Depression can be a vicious circle for those who already feel lonely; causing a low mood or lack of motivation which makes it very difficult for them to spend time with others. When they withdraw from others, the feelings of loneliness can increase. This can in turn deepen depression. And the lack of interaction with others may cause other health issues such as: Alzheimer’s, dementia, or other cognitive health problems. Watch for the signs of depression: feelings of hopelessness, loss of interest in activities, changes in sleep or appetite, and thoughts of suicide.
 
If you suspect your loved one is suffering from depression, talk with them. Let them know they are not alone. If the depression is serious, suggest they see a doctor for medication, or that they speak with a therapist. Offer to go with them to the doctor if they are afraid to go alone. Support them as they take the steps to improve their lives.

Walt Whitman wrote years ago in a beautiful poem:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference. 

This is a perfect poem to consider the road into the world of psychotherapy—a journey of self-discovery and transformation. Or a journey of measured recovery. This results in two definitions that stand before us, either of which any of us can choose. One, a journey within, kindling self-awareness and a zest for life. It's about unraveling layers, embracing your essence, and thriving. Or, second, a more clinical take—measured change in symptoms. The second often offers the quick results sought by managed care.

For me, my heart resonates with the first. Life is more than just survival; it's about thriving with joy. This means a choice for personal growth, depth psychology, existential consideration of our lives, or uncovering and learning from our mistakes, our past, our experiences. Insurance often does not cover personal growth, focusing instead on restoring function. Frequently they relate it to going to see your physician and reporting your symptoms, i.e.:  a cough, a tummy ache, or fatigue and having the physician diagnose the problem (pneumonia or a cold, stomach flu or an ulcer, or thyroid or anemia problems). Then the doctor prescribes medication, flu treatment, or cough medicine and hopefully within a few days you feel better. But in psychology and counseling you deserve more.  We're meant to evolve emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Pause and reflect: Which road do you choose? Is it the busier road of medical recovery? Or therapy to enhance your path and fulness in life?
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Challenge: Refuse to settle. Seek the best for yourself. Reflect on what needs resolution or growth. Take that brave step to seek professional guidance.

Your story can be one of growth and resilience. It only requires you choose that road